Really Funny Quick Jokes - Judo Tournament

One Day the Devil challenged the Lord to a Judo tournament. Smiling the Lord proclaimed, “You don’t have a chance; I have Kano, Mifune, Kotani, Kimura and all the greatest players up here”.
“Yes”, snickered the Devil, “but I have all the referees.”

Really Funny Quick Jokes - More exercise

Recently overheard in a doctor’s waiting room:
I used to watch golf on television, but the doctor said that I needed more exercise - So, now I watch tennis.

Really Funny Quick Jokes - No football

Q: Why didn’t the dog want to play football?
A: It was a boxer!

Really Funny Quick Jokes - Duuuuh Dumb Jock

He’s such a dumb jock, that when he was driving to the airport, he saw a sign that read, “Airport Left,” and he turned around and went home.

Really Funny Quick Jokes - My son swallowed the can opener

Mrs. Smith: Help me, doctor! My son, John, swallowed the can opener!
Doctor: Don’t panic. He’ll be alright.
Mrs. Smith: But how do I open the can of beans?! The toast is getting cold!

Really Funny Quick Jokes - Magic Johnson on rollerblades

What do you call Magic Johnson on rollerblades?
ROLLAIDS!

Really Funny Quick Jokes - Can i get yo something

The Marine aboard ship was beyond seasick.
A Navy Corpsman said, “Can I get you something ?”
The young Marine replied, “How about an island ?”

Really Funny Quick Jokes - I got my four

During the Vietnam war, a Lieutenant asked a Marine why he was falling back
during a really fierce battle.
“Didn’t you hear me say that we’re outnumbered 4 to 1 ?”
The Marine replied, “I got my four Sir.”

A guy gets back from a computer convention

A guy gets back from a computer convention and is telling his wife about how
it went, “Honey, It was so crowded, a real zoo. You couldn’t get a nerd in
edgewise!”

Really Funny Quick Jokes - How do you spell Canada?

How do you spell Canada?
*C-EH N-EH D-EH.

Really Funny Quick Jokes - No we won’t

At a press conference the Brunettes announce they are going to make a trip to
the Moon. The Redheads speak up “That’s been done before, we’re going to go to
Mars”. The Blondes speak up “That’s nothing, we’re going to be the first people
to go to the Sun”. One of the reporters says “Don’t you idiots know […]